I feel like I am on the verge of depression or anxiety or something. Overall I try to be pretty positive about life...or at least realistic. Normally the outlook I have is this: "Okay, I have some negative things in my life (health problems, dealing with divorced parents, money problems), but those are just things that I have to deal with. Everyone has some issues that affect them negatively and somehow you just move on and try to enjoy life as much as you can. Take joy in the little things because despite what TV/Movies would have you believe, they are the things that truly count. The grand gestures don't come around that often so you have to find a way to make life joyful."
But, as of the last week or so, my various issues (which all end up being related in one sort or another) have been really getting to me. Then this evening as I was taking a shower (a good place to pontificate) I realized that I need a plan(s). While I can't get rid of my health problems I can make them better by losing some weight. So I need a plan for that. Now, I've lost weight before (pre-rheumatoid arthritis) so I know I can do it again. It will be harder, but shit, life is hard.
As for the money issues....well, that's a much tougher problem to solve. See, both of my parents are bad with money. My dad is certainly worse than my mom, but all my life, all I've seen is poor spending habits and wrong financial decisions. My grandmother (who has done very well) told me to save, save, save. But I have never really known how to do that. I might save a little bit and then something comes up and the money is gone again. But, this is not an unsolvable problem. I can't cure my RA but I can cure my money problems. This will lower my stress and that will lessen the symptoms of my RA, so it helps all the way around.
Now, because I personally have no experience in managing money properly, I must turn to someone else who can help guide me. I have thought about taking a personal finance class at school, but worry that spending hundreds of dollars in student loans on a class to help me learn how to manage money is redundant. Perhaps not though; perhaps the payoff will be much greater than the initial investment. My other thought is that my dad's girlfriend (who is wonderful) is an accountant. While it is unlikely that she will be able to turn my dad's money woes around, perhaps she could help me a little with mine. At least point me in the right direction. I certainly don't want to place all of my eggs in her basket though.
Well, either way I feel a little bit better venting about this and also putting it into type. If any of you out in the blogosphere have had similar problems and have turned your life around, let me hear from you. Or even if you haven't and sympathize, you could comment on that as well.
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